Mother's Day

In honor of Mother's Day, I wanted to make a post about my own mother. ;)

My whole immediate family has not had the easiest life. I know every person has his/her own set of obstacles to overcome, but I often felt like we seemed to have more piled on top of us. The biggest trauma that happened to us is that my father passed away suddenly at the age of 42 of a heart attack. My brother was 15, I was 11, and my sister was 6. In one night, my mom found herself a single mother to three children.

We were recently posting memories of our dad (he passed away May 5th, 1994) and my mom brought up her recollection of that night. She was at work, while us kids were home with dad. I of course knew what happened at home - the memories will forever haunt me - but I didn't know what my mom went through. It was strange, and heartbreaking, to read. Being a mother now, I put myself in her situation and I cannot imagine what she went through. I know we often find strength when we need to, and my mom definitely did. So much so that I think we all don't truly know how much she suffered. She had to be our strength.

Looking back, I see the sacrifices she made for us so that we could have the best possible life she could provide. Somehow she made it work on only one income, and somehow she helped us through such a traumatic event and we all survived.

My disability was the next big thing to hit me. My mom was there every step of the way - taking me to appointments and being there in every way she could. I know it sounds selfish, but I never really thought how it all was affecting her at the time. I had enough to deal with how it was affecting me. Now I see what she must have gone through as well. I remember our last trip to Mayo Clinic when the doctors told me that they had no clue what I have and couldn't help me...I left the room in tears. I remember seeing her cry as well, and that image seems to be burned into my mind as well. I think that's when it actually dawned on me the extent that my mystery illness was affecting her as well. I wasn't totally oblivious - I knew everyone in my life was affected by it. But to see her grieve for the lost chance of a diagnosis and cure, it made me see that the person that was always so strong and there for me probably shed many tears in private that I didn't see.

She's been my friend, my champion, and my teacher among many other roles that she took with her main role of mother. It sounds so cliche to say, but I really couldn't have asked for a better mother. She taught all of us to go for what we dreamed of, and to not let things hold us back. All of my siblings and I have learned so much from her and have grown to be caring people. And I think the reason we are who we are now can be traced back to our mother.

So, Mom, there's what I wish a Mother's Day card could really say. Thanks for all that you have done and continue to do for us. I hope that you know every day that we do truly recognize and appreciate it all. I think we would have all been lost without you. Love you, Mom!